Mitzi...where have you been in a while? Updates 1/07/14 NEW YEARSSSS

SO long time no talk...right? Lovelies I know I am so sorry and I promised to be posting every other day but you know when you say your going to be doing it tomorrow and what not...hehe that's what happened. Lots of things have changed such as the school I'm going to, the country I'm in, interests and other things lol. Hey don't blame me I'm just a girl on her way to slowly transforming to a beautiful lady.

Do you ever picture yourself in the future? Like how you would be dressing, they way you are acting, the people surrounding you, and I don't know...just like the future in general. Lately that's all I've been thinking about...but you know I've noticed something. The only way I can become the woman I picture in the future is embody who she is. By changing myself bit by bit and slowly, not all at once cause I've tried that it was utterly horrible, I don't need a repeat of history. Though why would I want to change the bubbly overly happy mitzi? I don't know why. I think its about time I started acting the way I see the lovely lady mitz is. I feel like this change is coming put and about because I'm in that middle point where I'm not a teenager but I'm not an adult either. I've been constantly searching for myself and for some reason I can't seem to find myself. Its hard with so many options and opportunities that you can see your life going towards, but when you have people constantly doubting you and saying you could be so much more its a bit hard you know?  I don't want people molding me into someone I'm trying to avoid becoming, I see my future when I go down the path they want me to go and to be honest sure I'll have everything and have a nice future, but being me I want to take the hard and unexpected way of life. At least my life will have much more meaning and I'll be happier going out into the world of the unexpected.

I don't know about you but I've always seem myself as an extraordinary person (but not in that cocky way) more in the way as I know in my life I'll accomplish something great and unexpected and my name will be remembered for a while. I don't know what it is...but I know for sure one day you'll hear my name from every person you know and think wow she was able to accomplish or make or do that. She's incredible, amazing, and so many more adjectives. Haha I'm imagining the future once again. Though I just know, one day people who know me, knew me, one day will be praising and wondering how I was able to do this and that. I look forward to the day whatever comes my way and open my mind and arms fully.

Anywayssssss updates for days. I'm actually in the Philippines right now. See I told you new country. Why? How long? Well I came here Dec 2 and I'll be here until Jan 25. The reason being is this country is my home. I see this as a place where I can be comfortable and not worry (even though lots of people think I'm gonna get kidnapped) to be honest I've been here a bit more than a week and I know how to go to the mall now and go to the park to run and loads of other places and the people stare but I mean who wouldn't stare. (hair flips) Lol not in that way. It's just if your 5'5.5 (The .5 counts), a girl, and have fairer skin than most, they tend to stare. Plus they know if you're not from their country....isn't that strange. I don't even try to speak english here, but my cousins keep insisting to communicate with me in english. CONFUSED. I might be more of a potential target to get kidnapped. Lol though I have a feeling and hope to not get kidnapped in this beautiful country. Now you may be wondering why I'm here for so long. To be honest I was supposed to be here 3 months ago. I really wish I was here 3 months ago. The freedom, the feeling of being an adult. The fact that you have a limited amount of money...lol. but I am here cause this place is home. More home than San Diego for some reason. Its the place I can be at peace and not have to be constantly nagged and so on. Maybe I'll continue school here or maybe not. We'll see. I have a college tour coming up over here that is bound to get me more interested in this country. If only I had a condo here though. I'm currently sharing a place with my cousins and I can tell you that this space is only fit for one person. Though I'm not complaining cause I'm lucky to be able to stay in their home.

Moving on I have decided to go to a community/junior college. Why? Because I wasn't very satisfied at my college. I felt as if my life was going nowhere there, so here I am venturing onward with a slight idea in mind as to what I want to accomplish in my life. This is me taking a step towards things I want in life, and not what people want me to do, and I'm happy and scared to be going through with this. I don't know what to expect. To be honest though dealing with all the paperwork and the people at the college is crap. They totally don't know what they're doing. I asked them what I would need to do and they said I was all good in completing the process then when I tried to register for my classes it said I needed to complete this other form. I'm so mad. Like now I'm stuck with bad classes. But I guess that's what I get from going to Philippines instead of finishing up what I need to do. You learn you know...

Also I've decided to do an online audition for there tv series here which is essentially the same as big brother in whatever country your in. Except here its called PINOY BIG BROTHER. Basically I just have to say why I should be in the big brother house and I have an idea as to what I would like to plan with my one minute video. Thank god I know how to edit and upload lol. But yeah. Though I am already enrolled in classes and what not I would really want to stay here a bit longer and hopefully figure out more in life what I see myself doing which is getting involved with the media and entertainment world. Though it would be nicer if it was more world wide not just in the beautiful country of the Philippines.

Anyways moving it is also New Years EVE here in PI. So I decided to list my New Years Resolution here:

1. Be happy
2. Be healthier
3. Make wiser choices
4. Count each day
5. Exercise at least for 5-10 mins a day
6. Save a bit more money
7. Have a closer relationship with my parents
8. Make more beautiful memories
9. Have an unforgettable 21st birthday (LEGAL SOON)
10. Do more charity work
11. Be more at peace with myself
12. Find out more on where I see myself going in life
13. Write at least one song
14. Be more focused and responsible in 2014.

Haha I don't know about you but this is how I do my New Years Resolutions and I usually write it down and place it by my bedroom mirror so I can see it constantly. This next coming year I hope to make more of an impact and difference in my life. I don't know why but I feel as if this next year I will really become more of an adult. Maybe its a gut feeling or maybe its just like a hoping for a bit of a more mature mitz. Though I won't change that much....hehehe. I think its time to become a bit more adult like in my decisions about life. So while I'm here about to go to church (apparently its tradition to go to church on new years eve here in PI) I'm thinking about what to pray for in the future. 

Anyways I hope you all have a splendid new year!!! I'll be posting within a weeks time haha I keep promising to post but sometimes life has few things they keep throwing at me. Sorry if you didn't enjoy this post.... But onto the inspiration of the day!!

And until next time!!! Don't forget to keep your head up and spread the lovee!! 

Updates on life 6/18/13

Hey lovelies!!! It's been a while since I've posted on here. I've been a bit busy with life and trying to get a job but I will for sure be here to post at least once a week, if not every other day since I like this way of letting out feelings and sharing my thoughts about life with you guys. So I've been in an up and down mood lately cause of recent events.

First off I am excited to announce that I am indeed going to vidcon this coming Aug 1-3!! I am super excited. I am going with my cousin and I hope that by that time I have some subscribers on youtube since I do have that channel. (Btw I filmed some new videos and I'm editing them and hopefully will release that out soon!!)

Secondly, I've been having a few problems at university and to be completely honest I don't even know if I belong at school. I don't like it. I'm not happy and I feel trapped and forced to go to school just for my parents. It's that asian thing. I don't want to disappoint them anymore so I force myself to go to school, but I feel like this is like high school all over again. I think as an adult I should be able to choose whether or not I can make it out there in the real world before going to school. I don't feel motivated at all and to be honest I just want to be happy in life. Is that weird? I'd rather be happy, feel loved, be content with my life, than go to college. I think if I went to a school where I was more interested in subjects then I would enjoy it more and be more motivated. Then again, I did get myself into this situation. Maybe I should tell them what I really want to do...and not lie and have them choose for me...but I'm scared cause we always end up arguing at each other and not understanding each other. I just don't want them to be disappointed in me anymore. I want us to have that normal relationship where I don't have to lie to them anymore.

Thirdly, I've been thinking about moving somewhere. I want to explore and be in charge of my own life without having to think that I am bothering anyone else. I want to be free and be an adult and make my own decisions, but how can I do that when I still live and thrive of my parents. That's why I need to work and one day I'll be somewhere else. Maybe I'll move to la and find what I want to do there. Maybe something out there is waiting for me and I'm just missing my opportunity by going to school.

Fourth on the list, is I have a job now!! Yay for summer jobs!! Yay for earning money!!! And being able to make and earn my own money. To be honest I really enjoy earning my own money, it gives me a sense of pride and responsibility and makes me love that I don't have to rely on my parents for money in the summer. It's an amazing feeling to know that your being paid for your hard work and what not.

Lastly, I've been trying to be healthier cause I want to look sexy when I go to vid con!! I want to meet my favorite youtubers and them to be like damn...you hot!! Haha. SO I've been working out loads lately by following the blogilates june month of fitness, though I do work out twice a day. It gets really tiring though. Though I need to put myself in a strict diet cause I basically eat everything I want in life and its just whatever. I need to start being more serious. I have cheat days which is basically a whole weekend. I want to live a healthier lifestyle and I have vowed to not buy clothes untilI lose 20 lbs and notice a difference.

So theres my post for today. I will post another post in a bit because it is late and I do have work tomorrow.

Here's my inspiration of the day:

Until then... spread love and keep your head up!!